Not what the doctor, or customer, ordered

Consumer review of Sony Ericsson T68i mobile phone.
Published on ciao.co.uk, October 2003.

I didn't actually want this phone.

I'd had my last mobile nicked, and when I rang Orange to get it replaced I specifically asked for something that didn't look flashy, and thus wouldn't be attractive to other, light-fingered people.

Oops. Enter the flashiest looking phone ever, complete with bullseye target for pickpockets.

The phone has character too - I'm just not sure which one, maybe Harry Hill. It seems to be stuck in a mode of permanent lateral thinking, though much of this could be put down to the fact that since buying my first mobile in 1997, I've always had Nokias until the last two.

For example, the phone was the first I'd had with a colour screen - wooo. You could tell the hearts and diamonds from the spades and clubs when playing Patience...except it's not called "Patience". In fact, Snake isn't called Snake, it's called "Erix". Reversi/Othello is called, "Contrary" (which better describes the phone than a game on it), and - according to Sony Ericsson at least - Battleships is called "Naval Fleet". All games come with a list of which keys to press but no actual objective or instructions, which is fine for all the above, but not for a game that SE calls "Q". The real game was trying to figure out what the hell it was, something that kept me preoccupied on long tube journeys until only two months ago.

The meagre ringer and SMS volume mean you can't actually hear the phone if it's in your bag or jacket pocket, which has been the cause of umpteen missed calls and texts, from potential job interviews to my girlfriend arranging plans for the evening. This is bad enough when - according to the experts - men are from Mars and women from Venus, but the T68i is from a different planet again.

Menus are overly long and complicated, but at the same time, simple things are difficult to find in it. After every call, a time summary is displayed on the phone's screen. Look back a few seconds later and the thing's still there! Try as I might, I can't get rid of it, so making two phone calls in quick succession is almost faster if you switch the phone off and on again....which is unfortunately something the phone does best on its own, despite the keylock.

In the last few days the phone has become gravely ill, taking to displaying just one of a possible five bars for network signal. Needless to say, everyone else's phone nearby has a full stack of bars, and so has this one - once you've removed the battery and replaced it again.

The basic requirements of a phone are the ability to make and receive calls, wherever you are. This mobile fails on both accounts, and I just can't recommend it. Time for an upgrade to Nokia again methinks...

...and don't get me started on the fiddly joystick thing.